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why does Life keep on hitting me on the face?

just the other day i think i just lost a friend. i think i did/said something that made our friendship end. if it wasn't for that then maybe i could have had a more exciting, jollier, better christmas party with my friends.
and now -- people, they kept saying things that reminded me of that friend. i don't know if it's just coincidence or whatever.
well this is so unbelievable. i want to forget what happened, okay?
it was my fault. i feel terrible. i was stupid.
i was a fool.
and now
i want to forget.

so give me a break.
(but who's to blame. no one knows, ian. no one.)


crap. how could i be so stupid. and careless. and pathetic. and so emotional (?!?)

so this is what a fool, pathetic, emo person gets.

OUCH.


and now the thesis. crap talaga. holy crap.
sa sobrang kakaisip ko sa mga bagay-bagay, nakalimutan ko nang mag-thesis.
December 15 - i am supposed to spend this day for thesis alone. but what happened? i played Audition SEA, Audition PH, and Battle Realms the whole time.


i can't do this anymore.



PS.
To anne, happy birthday the other day.
To dude, happy birthday yesterday.
To my dad, happy birthday today.
To my mom, happy birthday tomorrow.
and
to you, i don't know what to say. it was my fault. i am sorry. i don't expect you to ever talk to me again but **sigh** ... :'(

photo courtesy of emo-corner